You just found out he cheated and you’re devastated.
You have endless questions about why, and a barrage of self-sabotaging thoughts that spin around in your mind.
You find yourself rubbing the center of your chest.
Your shattered heart is making it hard to breathe and the shame is overwhelming.
First I want you to know, there’s nothing wrong with you. You are not to blame.
So, he cheated on you. Now you are wondering whether he will change.
According to a major study which was conducted in North America and Europe, some people can change, whereas others can’t change (and never will). Also, some behaviors can be changed, but other behaviors can’t be changed at all. Now please let me explain.
You are not alone.
According to the National Health and Social Life Survey, 40% of married men, 16% of cohabiting men and 37% of dating men engaged in acts of sexual infidelity; by contrast, only 1% of married women, 8% of cohabiting women and 17% of women in dating relationships cheat on their partners.
Yes, you read that right. 40% of married men cheat on their wives (some wives just don’t know it & the statistics only include men who have admitted their affairs, so you can imagine how many men never admit their affairs).
Discovering betrayal in your relationship can be one of the most poignantly hurtful moments in your lifetime.
Regardless of the length of time you have spent with the involved partner, the pain caused by the unfaithfulness is immeasurable.
With the reveal of unfaithful truth, chaos arrives.
Infidelity can be emotionally draining, as well as incredibly frustrating to go through.
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Beyond the heartbreak, one might suddenly be faced with a host of new challenges…
… What are the next steps?
… Can the relationship be salvaged?
If there is a great divide and no chance for reconciliation, there may be a need to pursue separation, which could come at a great cost, both emotionally, and out of pocket.
These conversations can lead to a spiral, spinning one’s heart and emotions out of control.